Now when an Israeli says midnight to five AM, what that usually means is 2:30 until about 9 AM. They’re always late. At least when it comes to things that absolutely, positively have to be done on time. Last night everyone was prepared for a midnight cut-off. To be safe, many even planned to have all their water needs finished by 11:30. But nobody was prepared for a 10:30 cut-off. The water was shut off an hour and a half early! But it was my fault for not anticipating this. After all, at some point the construction workers had to make up for their perpetual tardiness.
Israel has a water shortage. This shouldn’t come to a surprise since it’s in the middle of the desert. But the past years have been especially bad. Many of the crops have been ruined because of drought, which in turn largely affects their agricultural production. (More about this here.)
Locals are used to limiting their water intake. They grow up practicing habits like turning off their faucets mid-brush or eating grapes without washing them. Unlike Americans who take two 30-minute steaming hot showers per day. When the bathroom mirrors fog up, Americans see this as an obstacle preventing them from staring at themselves, while Israelis see it as a chance to collect and drink the condensation.
Anyway, you can only imagine the apocalyptic crisis that must have occurred in our Anglo-dominated building when the water was cut short an hour and a half early. Chaos. “The water is out?! OMG!” some yelled. “I still have to brush my teeth!” others panicked. I too was upset, as I was quite dehydrated from running around the building screaming about not having water.
But none of these situations were as serious as poor Michelle’s. Michelle had just returned from a long jog on the beach. She smelled. And as she heated up the water and prepared for her shower, she was denied her basic right to cleanliness.
“I may not be able to go to work tomorrow,” she worried. But that didn’t make much sense. Israelis, mainly the religious, go days without showering or wearing deodorant. If anything, a nice bath may be considered a health violation here.
But since there was absolutely no way of knowing when the water would be turned back on, we improvised. We grabbed two water bottles that my friend had in his refrigerator, and planned to bathe Michelle. She quickly eliminated the idea of a full-body wash due to the fact that two guys were conducting this operation. Actually, really only one; I was more taking pictures. Which also didn’t help our plea for a full frontal wash. But her hair was the most important thing that needed to be cleaned. And due to the amount of hair she had, there wouldn’t have been enough water for her body anyway.
She tilted her head back and my friend started washing. And as he was scrubbing, I couldn’t help but think of Adam Sandler’s Israeli character, The Zohan. “I just want to make people silky-smooth!” I kept quoting in my head as I watched my non-Israeli (yet now honorary Israeli) friend masterfully wash Michelle’s hair with two bottles of water. I was witnessing Middle Eastern magic.
"The Zohan" washes Michelle's hair with a water bottle in the sink because of the building's early H2O shut-off.Moving on, at about 11:45 PM, about 15 minutes after finishing Michelle’s Israeli wash and 15 minutes before the water was supposed to be turned off, I returned to my room. I was still very thirsty, and forgetting that the water was shut-off, I turned on the faucet to get a drink. And of course, the water started to flow. I ran to the bathroom and turned on the shower. That was flowing too. Everyone started to come out of their rooms: “The water is back on!”
In my last post I talked about the very relaxed approach of an Israeli. We figured that since the water was turned off at 10:30, there was no predicting the next time it will be turned back on. So we panicked and tried to make the best of our situation, as most Westerners do. But had we just relaxed and waited a bit longer, the water would have been working fine; Michelle could have taken a full-body shower and I wouldn’t have been mentally preparing myself for another Yom Kippur fast. Patience is an essential skill to have as a developing Israeli.
But still, at least for one night we were able to convince an American girl to only use two bottles of water to wash her hair. I’m seriously putting in a bid to the Israeli government to receive some sort of Environmental Metal of Honor…
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